The Presentations Filled My Notebook. The Conversations Filled My Tank.

From the desk of an extroverted introvert

Over the past month, I’ve had the chance to attend two writing conferences.

The first was the Writers’ Guild of Alberta conference in Edmonton.

The second was this past weekend in Las Vegas at the Public Safety Writers Association conference.

Both were outstanding.

Both were completely different.

And both reminded me why writers need to get out from behind the keyboard once in a while.

Both conferences offered a wide variety of excellent presentations from experienced authors, editors and industry professionals. They shared everything from writing craft and presentation skills to marketing strategies and ways to expand your author platform.

At the Writers’ Guild of Alberta conference, I really enjoyed the insights of Edmonton’s award-winning novelist and journalist, Minister Faust. He walked us through his process of building unforgettable characters, introducing a practical framework that immediately made sense to me. He encouraged us to think about the Four F’s of conflict. When faced with adversity, does your character fight, flee, freeze, or fawn? More importantly, how does that response change depending on who they’re interacting with? It was one of those simple ideas that can completely change the way you build a character. If you understand how they naturally respond before you start writing, they’ll feel far more believable throughout the story.

Mary Lynn Cloghesy, a writer, editor and educator from Calgary, reminded us that becoming a better writer isn’t just about what happens at the keyboard. Long hours sitting in front of a computer eventually catch up with us. Looking after our posture, exercising regularly and protecting our mental health aren’t distractions from writing—they’re part of becoming the kind of writer who can keep doing it for years.

Las Vegas was a different experience altogether.

During my business career, I attended more conferences than I can count. But my occasional visits to writers’ groups usually left me feeling like the odd person out. Very few people were writing crime fiction, police procedurals or legal thrillers.

This time, I spent four days surrounded by people who spoke my language.

Crime and mystery writers. Retired detectives.

Police officers, parole and penitentiary officers.

Lawyers. Psychologists. Forensic experts.

People who understood why someone might spend twenty minutes debating how long it takes to process a crime scene or whether a particular caliber would realistically produce a certain result.

It felt like I’d found my tribe.

New York Times bestselling author John Gilstrap shared practical advice on communicating with readers, whether you’re talking to an audience from your office or standing on stage in front of hundreds. James L’Etoile and Ellen Kirschman kept us completely engaged as they discussed serial killers, criminal psychology and the differences between organized and disorganized killers. Listening to people who have spent decades studying human behavior explain why some offenders can hide in plain sight was fascinating.

I came home with pages of notes.

But if I’m honest...

Those weren’t my favorite parts.

I’m an Extroverted Introvert

I’ve always joked that I’m an extroverted introvert. Put me in a room full of strangers and, for the first few minutes, you’ll probably find me hovering near the coffee table, quietly taking everything in. Once someone starts a conversation, though, I’m in my happy place. I genuinely enjoy hearing people’s stories.

Before heading to Las Vegas, I made myself a promise. Instead of sitting quietly and observing, I was going to introduce myself to as many writers as I could. I wanted to tell them about my upcoming YouTube channel, Destination Write, get their honest feedback, and, more importantly, learn about their own writing journeys.

I wasn’t trying to recruit guests as much as I was trying to understand the people I hope to serve. What made them decide to write? What obstacles had they overcome? What were they struggling with now? What kind of information would actually help them move forward?

The response honestly surprised me.

I spoke with bestselling authors, career writers, editors, people polishing their tenth manuscript, and others who had only recently decided they wanted to write their first book. Almost every conversation ended the same way. Someone would smile and say, “I’d love to be part of that,” or “That’s a really interesting way to help writers.”

Those conversations validated something I’d been quietly hoping was true.

Maybe writers aren’t looking for another place to hear someone talk about bestseller lists or marketing strategies.

Maybe they’re looking for a place to talk about the journey itself.

The doubts and the victories.

The habits that helped them improve.

The lessons they wish someone had shared with them years ago.

That’s exactly what I hope Destination Write becomes.

Writers Collect Stories

One thing became obvious over the course of those two conferences. Writers are always collecting stories.

On the airport shuttle, the gentleman sitting beside me asked the question we all get asked sooner or later. “So...what do you do?” For one of the first times, I answered without hesitation. “I’m semi-retired. I write thrillers.”

Six months ago, I probably would have led with my previous career in sales. Somehow that still felt like my identity. Saying, “I’m a writer,” felt almost presumptuous, as though I had to earn the title by publishing a book first. Maybe that’s imposter syndrome. Maybe it’s humility. Whatever it was, it seems to be fading.

As it turned out, the gentleman beside me had written a book himself. What started as a casual conversation became an hour-long discussion about business, retirement, writing and life. He’s currently selling a successful technology company as he transitions into retirement, and before we stepped off the shuttle we’d exchanged contact information. With a little luck, you’ll meet him on a future episode of Destination Write.

That conversation reminded me that you never really know who’s sitting beside you.

The next memorable conversation happened in an Uber on my way to Harry Reid Airport. My driver had been a police officer until a serious traffic collision at work ended his career when he was only twenty-five years old. He survived the accident, but his policing career didn’t.

Like so many first responders, he’d been carrying that story around for years. He told me he’d often thought about writing it down but wasn’t sure where to begin.

I told him something I’ve started believing myself—that writing doesn’t solve everything, but it can help us make sense of experiences that never completely leave us. Sometimes putting words on paper is less about creating a book and more about understanding your own story.

By the end of the ride, he’d promised to follow Destination Write.

I hope he does.

The Conversation I Still Think About

One conversation happened several months before either conference, but I found myself thinking about it again while I was in Las Vegas.

I was flying to Palm Springs and, if I’m being honest, I wasn’t much of a seatmate for the first couple of hours. I was buried in my own thoughts, working through plot lines and characters for my new thriller series, Bunkerville.

When we landed, we ended up sitting on the tarmac for almost half an hour waiting for a gate. Eventually we started chatting.

He asked what I did.

Again, I hesitated before admitting that I was writing a novel. At that point, Court of Equalization still aways from being published, and somewhere in my mind I had convinced myself that you weren’t really an author until someone else said you were.

Funny how we do that to ourselves.

When I finally shared what I was working on, his whole demeanor changed. He told me he’d started writing the same family story several different times but kept getting stuck because he couldn’t decide whether to write it in first person or third person.

We spent the next half hour talking about point of view, voice, and the strengths of third-person limited. Watching someone begin to see a path forward was incredibly rewarding.

My biggest regret?

I never asked for his contact information.

He would have made a fantastic guest on Destination Write because I know there are thousands of aspiring writers wrestling with exactly the same question.

I’m getting better at recognizing those opportunities.

Those conversations reminded me of something I probably should have known already.

Everyone has a story. Usually several.

If we’re willing to slow down, ask a few questions, and genuinely listen, people will often share experiences that are far more interesting than anything we could have imagined on our own.

Success Leaves Clues

One of the things I’m looking forward to most with Destination Write is having conversations with writers—not just about the books they’ve published, but about everything that happened before they ever held a finished copy in their hands.

What made them start writing? When did they almost quit? What habit made the biggest difference? What tool, resource, mentor or piece of advice changed the trajectory of their writing career?

Every successful writer has taken a different path, but I have a feeling there are common threads running through all of them. Small habits. Small decisions. Moments when someone offered encouragement at exactly the right time.

Those are the conversations I want to uncover.

Because somewhere, someone is facing that exact obstacle today.

Why I’ll Keep Going Back

Before this past month, I would have told you the presentations were the reason to attend a writing conference.

I don’t think that anymore.

The presentations were outstanding, and they absolutely filled my notebook with ideas I’ll use for years to come.

But it was the conversations between the sessions that filled my tank.

I came home with pages of notes, a growing list of future guests for Destination Write, and more ideas than I can probably tackle this year.

More importantly, I came home reminded that writing may be a solitary pursuit, but becoming a writer doesn’t have to be.

So...Where Are You on Your Writing Journey?

I’d love to hear your story.

Have you always wanted to write a book but haven’t started?

Are you halfway through your first manuscript?

Working on your fifth novel?

Or maybe you’ve already published and are wondering what comes next?

Wherever you are, leave a comment below.

One of the things I’ve learned over the past month is that writers love talking about writing. Sometimes all it takes is someone willing to ask the first question.

That’s what I hope Destination Write becomes—a place where writers, no matter where they are on the journey, can learn from one another, encourage one another, and realize they’re not nearly as alone as they sometimes feel.

Writing may be a solitary pursuit.

But becoming an author doesn’t have to be.

Every successful writer has people who helped along the way—teachers, critique partners, editors, beta readers, mentors, family members, or simply another writer who said, “Keep going.”

That’s one of the reasons I started Destination Write.

Because the strongest books aren’t built in isolation.

They’re built by writers who are willing to learn from others, ask questions, and become part of a community.

Build your team. Build your book.